The Lessons of Rebirth

 This is not going to be a post about fresh starts.

Well, not exactly.

It's a post about the trickery of fresh starts, especially those rooted in external events: New Year's Day, the first day of school, or the beginning of spring.

These events are rife with trickery because of one simple truth: no matter how many things in our lives are new or different or fresh, we still bring ourselves with us.

So if you really want things to be different, you have to figure out how you're going to keep your habits and patterns and thoughts from repeating you right into the same choices you've always made and actions you've always taken. Because we all know that just gets you what you've always gotten, right?

For me, this means trying to fight past my impulse to eat something really easy that requires almost no effort after having a particularly stressful day. But it also means having plan-compliant foods that require little or no preparation on hand and ready to go for when I lose that battle. It also means not keeping any non-compliant food in my living space. 

It also means knocking off my lifelong habit of people pleasing. First, that eliminates saying yes to foods I'm not eating right now or situations where I'm tempted to indulge. Second, it lessens the instances of selling myself out and creating an atmosphere where I want to push negative feelings down by burying them under a pile of French fries or pizza or ice cream or any of the other stuff I used to shove down my throat the same way a dentist shoves a shot of Novocaine in your gums. Of course, just like with the Novocaine, it wears off and the pain is still there, often worse than it was before.

HUGE DISCLAIMER: I am not perfect at any of this. At all. I'm just trying to find the lessons in the places I've failed in the past so I don't make those mistakes again. COVID has shown me just how small my life had become before the world shut down. When it opens back up, I want to be ready to be part of it again.


Comments

  1. Susan HApril 5, 2021 at 7:49 AM

    You have disclosed some great insights, Mel. I know how difficult this can be, but you are off to a great start. Thanks for sharing your journey

    ReplyDelete

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